Dogs win, plain and simple:
-I can easily choke out a dog for eating my dinner, then bury it in the back yard without the neighbors asking why.
-Kids need school supplies.
-If I feed my dog beer I don't go to jail.
- Kids legally have to have their shots.
-If my dog doesn't wear a seat-belt its normal and not considered "endangerment".
- I can train my dog to maim intruders, I can't train a kid to do that without seriously worrying about my own safety.
- I have never had to give a dog the 'sex talk' about the opposite sex.
- If I buy a new TV or dirt bike instead of squeaky toys my dog doesn't get upset and need years of therapy.
- Dogs live for 10-14 years tops, then they die; kids live for 80+ years. Basically you get to start over about every decade or so with dogs, kids remember all the dumb stuff you did when they where younger.
- Kids whine when you make them sleep outside or on the floor.
-Dogs are scientifically proven to be a stress reliever, I am pretty sure kids cause cancer.
-Kids are needy and break stuff. Plain and simple. Dogs break stuff too but they are so much more laid back about it.
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Further research:
-I once saw a dog dog that could fetch beer out of a closed refrigerator.
-Chuck Norris would rather have a dog.
-Has a firehouse or college ever used a kid as its mascot? I think not.
and one last one:
-Baby fights are way less exciting than dog fights. Just ask Michael Vick.
Case closed, dogs are better than children. End of story. Goodnight.
(Originally written May 2009)
-I can easily choke out a dog for eating my dinner, then bury it in the back yard without the neighbors asking why.
-Kids need school supplies.
-If I feed my dog beer I don't go to jail.
- Kids legally have to have their shots.
-If my dog doesn't wear a seat-belt its normal and not considered "endangerment".
- I can train my dog to maim intruders, I can't train a kid to do that without seriously worrying about my own safety.
- I have never had to give a dog the 'sex talk' about the opposite sex.
- If I buy a new TV or dirt bike instead of squeaky toys my dog doesn't get upset and need years of therapy.
- Dogs live for 10-14 years tops, then they die; kids live for 80+ years. Basically you get to start over about every decade or so with dogs, kids remember all the dumb stuff you did when they where younger.
- Kids whine when you make them sleep outside or on the floor.
-Dogs are scientifically proven to be a stress reliever, I am pretty sure kids cause cancer.
-Kids are needy and break stuff. Plain and simple. Dogs break stuff too but they are so much more laid back about it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Further research:
-I once saw a dog dog that could fetch beer out of a closed refrigerator.
-Chuck Norris would rather have a dog.
-Has a firehouse or college ever used a kid as its mascot? I think not.
and one last one:
-Baby fights are way less exciting than dog fights. Just ask Michael Vick.
Case closed, dogs are better than children. End of story. Goodnight.
(Originally written May 2009)
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